Sit with it, psychology supervisors would say in grad school. She needs to sit with her sadness, guilt, dilemma, etc. In practice, I learned that most clients interpret this as submitting to their inner attacker until it hurts a lot, really really enough, and then, having done their duty, getting back to what’s actually fun and lively. Fortunately, as I sat in my own meditation, I was able to clarify the process and then guide clients through it. Sitting with it means that we allow the connection between thoughts and feelings to dissolve. When they stop reinforcing each other, we are freed from repetitive loops and we can actually move on, not just push through.
But here’s the thing: When stuff feels awful, we work pretty hard at this. We get good at identifying our inner critical introjects and naming them as thoughts and not obeying them and returning to our sensation and All That. Because we want to feel better, right? But then we do. We feel better. And then we’re done, we think. No more pain. I graduated. But… then… alas. It slips away. What happened to that good feeling?
That’s the question in the air, along with
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